I'm glad

"you have an amazing talent and I'm glad people can see it and connect with you on different levels"

do I live for this bullshit of a social contact and acceptance? is it like success, is it heart-warming?
for how long?


this pit is so deep, I must've fallen in it during dark, I would never make such a mistake at daytime.


People thought I was born a woman. Early-on I tried to show them otherwise.
I was not born anything in particular. I was born a human. Not even a real person for the first dozen years. My cushy insides where still not battered into shape by beatings, tears, love, hobbies, curiosity, disappointments, habits.
Today I do not have the shape of woman. I do not have the shape of man.
I'm just as hungry and lonely as all of you, or maybe even more.
Too broken for stability in a couple, and too fragile to remain alone.
I'm just as hungry and lonely as all of you, or maybe even more.
I wouldn't eat you though. My belly is shut and my mouth is sewn.
You disgusted me deeply a long time ago and I am still fearful of your taste.
You taste like love, you taste like cancer.
I do not always tell the difference.
Do you have the answer?




I love you.
Don't ever fucking question that.