№200

аплодисменти за:

- новото начало

- мортал комбат

- добрите приятели

най-мразим:

- ставните болки

- плоските лъжи, защото дълбоките не сме ги усетили

- несигурността

Radio

аз ще бъда радио

поиграй си със звука ми,

много моля!

дълги, къси

всякакви вълни

електрически сме възбудими

ако бягам

завържи ме

накажи ме да предавам Хоризонт

аз съм радио

машина с звук

но без картина

новините

времето

часа

музика модерна за нощта

според твоето желание

ти настройваш

аз звуча

и моля

нека да е силно

хх-овете

тишина,

но не като нещо убийствено,

несамота,

разсечена

с чуждият дъх.

присъствие

вместо хапче.

с човек

лекувам болният си дух

празнина

в моята душа

отваря точно място за теб

чужда топлина

чужда коса

мое спокойствие

чисто привидно

пак тишина

нищо повече от това

пак

пак и пак и пак
разтваряш ляв,
а после десен крак.
съвсем готова за прегръдка.

моно

моногамно извратена,
може би си по-добра,
но и ти все пак
бедрата си разтапяш
върху чужди телеса.
Но какво, какво пък от това?
Щом перверзията е споделена,
кой ще може да те спре,
кой ще я превърне в забранена?
Майка ти, съда?
Без значение, когато си задоволена

a chance

a thousand kisses later

I found the world is empty

every time I move I'm at a crossroad

red light ahead and I press forward

always on the wrong side of the pavement

I can't see my chance for change

I rent my life and put on glasses

with which I cannot see

the liberation left me chained

my happiness is an equation

wrongly solved by our economy

and hope and love will save me?

I cannot see the future

when there's no air to breathe

thank God I have my medication

to put my shafts into rotation

so I'll continue to consume

With years my ambitions faded

I never got a proper chance

Smiles and kisses get me jaded

but I have nothing better anyway

We Will Set You Free

Liberators are the greatest plague humanity has ever suffered and it has repeated itself inexhaustibly all throughout our history. Ancient times saw their tyrants taking over the independent towns in Ancient Greece and the 20th century had its great surge of dictatorship, and we are just beginning to cut the strings of the last of the latter.

I am scared to death of being liberated! My own freedom was always perceived by me as my own business, and i really didn't want to intrude in anybody else's peace, but the conditions of society have made it all impossible. Just like there is no single answer to a single epic and general question about the troubles of man, there is no way I can achieve my liberty and happiness as an individual cell in an organism so mind-bloggingly intrusive, controlling and driven from its self-interest, not mine. That's the whole trouble, we are all brothers and sisters, and yet we are not one. We are not a communal organism, because we not so much work with each other, as work against for personal gain. It is a primitive and untrue perception of us presented by Game Theory and applied in economy. This sort of trained many people into this line of behavior, especially economists themselves, I believe. Where we ended up is the exact opposite of where we wanted to be. I cannot trust my government and I cannot trust the big businesses. I know that the market would rather exploit me, than take on the huge trouble of making me comfortable and happy. I am being bullshitted everyday and trained into consumerism. The ideals set before me are all numbers and no soul, so I cannot relate, I am pressured instead of motivated and I am less humane. Doesn't pressure make every being this way?

It's one catch 22 after another. And suddenly, under human touch the numbers started lying about how well society is really doing, because behind numbers there were words, and behind the words were humans. We are clever manipulators, if anything, we can lie. Hospitals lie about the good services they provide. Social workers lie about the results they achieve. Schools cheat on their own tests! The logic of mathematical theories behind economy and social structure lead us to a bizarre and illogical world. Mathematics forgot it is not dealing with number, but with humans when applied to society. And the numbers were supposed to liberate us. We were to achieve them however we please, but instead ended up dogged down.

If we do not want to join this liberation, or some other one, we surely will be an obstacle in its implementation and thus must be destroyed. You do not agree capitalism is the way to go? You must disappear! You do not agree with the communist doctrines? You must be shot dead! There will be no other thoughts, but my own, said the leader! There will be no other leader but me! There will be no other liberty, than the one I bestow upon you, for I know better of your own interest, said the leader. However, he was wrong, because winning the biggest race in society depraves you from the ability to dispatch your gained power to the people and trust them with their own happiness. So you force yourself, you force your beliefs and force everybody to dance happily around you, so it would seem it is all working and it is not all done for the leader.

You will be free. And if you do not want freedom, we will force it on you.

Yes, this is the sort of thing we've been getting for MILLENIA! Haven't we grown? Haven't we found a way around this? Negative liberty doesn't seem applicable, but what does? Anarchism? Dismissed. It will never be allowed to happen, and even so I am not hopeful of the outcome. In all seriousness, we should be afraid when "freedom" is pronounced from powerful men, because it always means the opposite. The balance between it-freedom, and security is the very thing we are tittering back and forth to and cannot seem to recognize either one.

We are lost.