strange

I found what I was seeking so long. I filled in the gap. Hi, love. I can say I'm mildly disappointed.

I loved Joe

I loved Joe for far too many reasons. Above all I loved that guy cause he fucked the Hell out of every girl he wanted, every muff he could get his filthy hands on. And when he left them ruined I came in the scene to sooth the wounds of their hearts. And fuck them again. Let God not allow that I ever have a daughter! This is my greatest fear! She'll be the only woman I care about and knowing what a bitch Fortune is she'll send my baby right in the arms of a bastard like myself to desecrate her. Kokoschka had some nasty opinion about women, nobody ever told him what makes the girl into a woman. It's man. He tares a hole open in her soul. And the soul of a woman is in a very peculiar place, and when he violates the little frail thing the monster inside can go free. Virgin Poison can last an eternity. Nobody told Kokoschka that. But Kokoschka didn't know guys like Joe and me. We create the women he hated. Fucking gets more complicated, but it's ever so enjoyable. Like the pig enjoys the dirt it wallows in. The woman is a creature you can push in both ways, one imperfection leading one way and the second one leading in another. Joe and I only push in one direction. See, a man's job is to not fall in love. Until he does not, he is safe. Joe and I, we always play on the safe side. We don't look too deep, we don't stare for too long. We aim to pass by quicker and leave the ruins behind. We leave the ruins to become a female spider.

C'mon, Joe. Let's go.

it is not enough

one love is never enough, is it?

the pain, the sweet pain of all the hearts you broke and all the wounds you tore each other are what constitutes your high price.

it's beautiful to be loved. violently. bloody.

you trouble and you pull your hair. oh, they love you, they are dying for you! they are screaming for you, begging for your fluids to quench their thirst! the thrills speed up your heartbeat. the guilt and the inflated parts of your mind keep you awake at night. satiate them. quench their thirst and kill their love for you, because when the chase is over you realise how pitiful your pray is. they scream no more. they do not need you. give them a month. give them two. wait a while, they get tired easily. escape and let them feel thirsty again and when again they say they love you, bite the hook. bite it hard and bite it deep, let it puncture your heart, puncture your eyes, puncture your ears. they all lie to you.

you've got a hundred howling bitches craving your meat with a ferocity only fanaticism and hunger can adorn you with. a hundred bitches howling lies at the Moon, with a solemn promise to chew up, spit out and leave you. Run after them and feel responsible. Save their souls. Save them while they eat yours out. Every bite in your flesh causes me pain. Every act of foolishness you commit inflicts a wound in my skin. Until I cannot see you any more. I cannot bare the sight.

I hear some bitches howling. Better run over and see what they want. They'may play dead for you once more. I don't play dead. I become dead. Games are for the times you have fun. These times are over.

I hear some tears falling. It does not really matter.

It's not enough. They come of two and the same eyes.

It's not enough.

We need more complications.

It's not enough. It is still breathing.

We need more complications.

She will not die. Why won't she die?

Don't worry. We just need more screaming.

Send more complications.

Why's she breathing?

Don't worry. Bring more complications.

It's not enough. She won't die.

He will kill her.

He will kill her out of carelessness.

Give her time.

Give him time.

Everything dies. Don't you know that? Just give it enough time.

vent

Когато не мога да го изкажа, набъбва и събира гной.

а откога не съм говорила?

От твърде дълго.

Благодаря ти.

благодаря ти.

Благодаря ти!

Благодаря Ти!!!

Друго е да си поприказваш сам. It makes the pain go away, don't it?